What if we all asked for help when we needed it?
So why can we find it so hard to ask for help?
“Being first to ask for help in a friendship takes courage and humility.” Afton Rorvik Click To Tweet
The barriers to asking for help:
- Not wanting to burden someone else
- Fear of rejection or being ignored
- Fear of seeming incompetent or weak
- Fear of being judged or even labelled
- Not wanting to feel indebted
- Feeling vulnerable
- Not knowing who to ask or where to go for support
- Hoping the problem will go away by itself
The benefits of asking for help:
- Less stress
- Getting things done that wouldn’t be possible otherwise
- New outlooks, possibilities and ideas.
- Learning new techniques and tools
- Lessening of overwhelm
- Sharing problems
- May lead to a helpful diagnosis
- It allows the other person the gift of giving
- Takes pressure off the family unit
- Reducing loneliness
- Making deeper friendships
Here’s how to do it!
- Ask the other person at a time when they have space and time to listen
- Ask someone who is likely to be willing to give freely, not someone with a history of manipulation or deal making.
- Ask from a place of truth and integrity
- Be clear and direct
- Explain specifically what it is you need support with, it could be something as simple as having someone to listen to you.
- Trust that the other person will say no if they choose to.
- Remember if the other person says no, they are saying no to the task, not to you personally.
- If they say yes, express gratitude!